


when the rain washes you clean (you'll know)

by ZOMBIECB97



Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms, Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Afterlife, Alive L (Death Note), Alternate Universe - Kira Wins (Death Note), Angst, Canon - Anime, Character Death, Dead L (Death Note), Death, Death Note References, Death Note Spoilers, Gay, Heavy Angst, How Do I Tag, Inspired by Death Note, L Lawliet - Freeform, L Needs a Hug (Death Note), L is a Little Shit (Death Note), L is babie, L kinnies rise, LGBTQ Themes, Light Yagami - Freeform, M/M, Manga & Anime, Mentioned Amane Misa, Mentioned Matsuda Touta, Mentioned Mello | Mihael Keehl, Mentioned Near | Nate River, Minor Amane Misa/Yagami Light, One-Sided Amane Misa/Yagami Light, POV L (Death Note), Sad Ending, The Roof Scene, Wammy's House (Death Note), Wammy's House Era (Death Note), Yagami Light is Kira, Yagami Light is a Little Shit, lawlight, light doesn't actually like misa but we all know that, light imagay, light slander is always allowed, misa misa - Freeform, my rendition of the roof scene i guess???, quotes and events arent exact, sorry no homoerotic foot massages in my rendition lol, there is only pain!, this is just really sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-19
Updated: 2021-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-28 01:08:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30131697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZOMBIECB97/pseuds/ZOMBIECB97
Summary: “You know, Misa, a lot of people would die for the ones they love,” L started, slowly trudging closer to the pair as the rain continued on. Misa stayed put. Light, as knowing as ever, took a step back. “But have you ever heard of living for someone you love?”ormy rendition of the roof scene which involves misa amane.
Relationships: Amane Misa/Yagami Light, L & Yagami Light, L/Yagami Light, Lawlight - Relationship
Comments: 5
Kudos: 16





	when the rain washes you clean (you'll know)

**Author's Note:**

> title is lyrics from the song "dreams" by fleetwood mac. i would definitely recommend listening to the song before/during your read for a better experience!

The rain was cold and wet, and almost painful when it fell onto L’s pale face that dreadful afternoon. Maybe it was because he was closer to the sky with him being up on the roof and all, and that's why it hurt so much more when it hit him. Maybe it was just because he felt numb everywhere else and his body was craving for some kind of feeling, anything. He didn’t quite know.

What he did know, though, was that his end was near.

When sunrise came that morning (he wouldn’t really have called it a sunrise because the sun was nowhere to be seen), L thought he was hearing things at first. It wouldn’t have surprised him, seeing that with the newfound knowledge of the Death Note, he had gone multiple nights without sleeping, too engrossed in the “power” that this ordinary-looking notebook held and how it was able to kill thousands. But no, he wasn’t hearing things because- _there!_

_Dong… Dong… Dong…_

He was hearing the bells again.

He wanted to mention this first thing to Watari, but ultimately decided against it to spare him of his crazy talk. He just wanted to warn him, but he didn’t know how. So instead, he spent his morning inspecting the Death Note for the thousandth time, trying to figure out what to do with it while the bells droned on in the background.

Soon enough it had passed noon, and he really couldn’t take it anymore. The Kira case, the ringing in his ears, everything. He left his room with only a small glance thrown his way from Watari and headed for the fire escape staircase, his thumb finding its way back to his mouth absentmindedly.

And that was how he ended up drenched on the roof of the investigation building, his hair sopping, and heavy, and falling in his face even more than usual. He supposed the look on his face matched the dreary setting surrounding him. The world was so gray in that moment, both literally and metaphorically, and for once L had wished the sun would have at least made some kind of appearance to brighten things up. You know, since it was his last day to see it and all.

Between the pouring rain and the incessant dong of the bells, there was no way for him to have heard the roof door being opened and then slammed shut with the wind. Only when he was able to detect a slight movement from between the strands of hair in his face was when he turned his head and saw Light standing a few feet away from him by the roof entrance.

 _Oh, perfect Light, you’ve come to step in for the sun!_ he thought, and he was smiling on the inside.

Light opened his mouth, but it was just a mere whisper with all the noise already going on around them. He raised his eyebrows a bit in question and put his hand to his ear, signaling to Light that he didn’t hear him. Light spoke out into the storm once again, a bit louder than before, but still it did not reach L’s ears. _This is really getting comical now._

L couldn’t help it this time, he had to smile while he signaled for Light to be louder once again. He saw the frustration on the younger man’s face and only got that much more of a kick out of it.

“I said, what the hell are you doing up here?!” Light shouted, only a foot or two away from L now, and finally he had heard what he said. Frankly, he didn’t know if he wanted to tell Light the truth, didn’t know if he would react the same way Watari did when he told him about the bells the first time, but it was almost the end and he was sick of playing this game. At least his last few hours alive could be spent in pure honesty.

His smile dropped, and he turned his head away from Light before saying, “I heard the bells again.”

Light looked puzzled, to say the least. “The bells? What bells?”

“ _The bells._ There’s always a reason why you hear them. Maybe this time it’s a wedding… or a church… or…” he trailed off, his voice being swept away with the wind. Instead of a blank face with wide eyes like usual, his expression was melancholy and his eyes were drooping with exhaustion and sadness. He could feel Light analyzing him like he had analyzed Light ever since the first time they met. He wondered if, deep down, Light had always felt as hot as L did under his gaze. He would never know because he would never ask, and he wouldn’t live to see the day where he would find out on his own, either.

“Light… Can’t you feel it? It’s almost time for us to say our goodbyes.” he turned to face him once again as he said this, wanting to see the initial reaction for himself. There was a knowing glint behind those young eyes, but he only saw it for a second before it was gone and Light was ignoring him and putting on another act.

“C’mon Ryuzaki, it’s cold and now I’m soaked to the bone! Let’s go inside,” Of course he had to whine, and L was usually pretty good at ignoring him before when he did that. Now was different, and so he allowed himself to take in the annoyed look on his face, his hair dripping into his eyes. He raised his hand to brush it out of the way and L almost wanted to swat it away so he could do it for him instead. He didn’t.

“Light, when you go inside, would you mind getting Misa for me? She’s here today, right?” L said suddenly, almost like he was in a rush to ask him this. He really did only have so much time left.

Again, Light was as confused as ever. Sure, L and Misa were “friends'' as she herself had deemed them to be, and they _did_ talk nicely to each other… Well, at least a few times they did, apart from the multiple hours of L interrogating her back when he suspected her to be the second Kira. He wanted to smile again remembering all the times she loosely called him a pervert out of defense. _Misa Amane… I think I might miss you after all._

“I… I don’t think she’s around today, Ryuzaki.” Light said, and his voice was careful, tiptoeing out of his mouth. His eyebrows were furrowed and when he scrunched his face up like that, he looked so much older. It felt like only yesterday they were sitting side by side at their university ceremony. Light’s face was much younger then, even though it hadn’t been that long since. L didn’t like knowing that Light would soon be getting older without him.

“You’re her boyfriend, aren’t you? Don’t you have all one million of her phone numbers?” L responded with as much of his usual attitude that he could muster in that moment. At that, Light just sighed, and his whole body slumped with it, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as he turned around with his phone, leaving L by himself on the roof once more.

L couldn’t help himself, he counted every minute Light was away. He was shivering from head to toe at this point, but he couldn’t care less. He waited, and he waited, and he hoped that he would have enough time to get what he wanted out of Misa’s thick skull.

Right when he swore the bells started to sound more farther away, the roof door slammed open again, and Misa’s shrieks were all that filled the air as Light quite literally shoved her out into the rain.

“LIGHT! Are you _serious?!_ This was a brand new top!” she yelled at the top of her lungs, her bright yellow hair already getting soaked. L waited for her to huff in annoyance and turn towards him, stamping her foot on the cement with her fists balled up at her sides. Her eyeliner was running down her cheeks, and there was a fire behind her eyes despite the downpour.

“Well?! What did you need me to come out into the freezing cold rain for, huh?” she sassed childishly.

“Please, Misa,” L started, trying to calm her down, “I just needed to ask you something.”

She huffed again, crossing her arms and jutting her right hip out. “You couldn’t have asked me inside?” Now it was L’s turn to sigh. He shoved his hands in his pockets and moved closer to the pair since he was still so close to the edge of the building.

“Misa, tell me… How much do you love Light?” This question seemed to shock them both. Light was furrowing his eyebrows even harder than before while Misa’s expression only brightened in return.

“Well, of course I love him a whole bunch, silly!” she cried out, a smirk taking over her once angry features. She was glowing right in the middle of this murky world.

“Enough that you would do anything for him?” L immediately countered back, his eyes slowly widening to their usual size. Misa was once again taken aback, but firmly nodded her head yes.

“Dare I say…” L began, not being able to force his thumb away from attaching itself to his lower lip, “you’d _die_ for him?”

Misa could only look at L with that fire slowly growing behind her eyes, her mumble of, _“Of course I would.”_ ghosting off her lips. Behind her, Light was staring right through L, right into his soul. He had never felt so bare before. It felt nice not to be so secretive for once.

“You know, Misa, a lot of people would die for the ones they love,” L started, slowly trudging closer to the pair as the rain continued on. Misa stayed put. Light, as knowing as ever, took a step back. “But have you ever heard of _living_ for someone you love?”

She stood in thought for a moment, and L could tell she was genuinely thinking about it by the way she stared at her platform boots with her hand placed over her heart.

“Yeah, I think I’ve heard of it. And if you saying that means that you’re gonna ask me if I’d live for Light, too, then what do you think I’m doing right now, huh?” Misa gave L a look, and he wished she wasn’t so dense. He wished she was as smart as Light. He wished she would just _know_ , and that would be that.

For the first time in a long time, L let himself chuckle, an ugly little laugh, and then, “If that’s how you see it, then aren’t we all living for the one we love? You, Light… Me?” he asked finally, and he made sure to look past her towards the only one he really cared about in this conversation.

No one said anything, so he answered the question himself.

“Oh, yes… If only I could live long enough to give them every last bit of love I have, and then some.”

Then, for the first time in a long time, L saw fear written all over Light’s face. It was plain as day, no hiding, _no secrets_. He smiled. This was all he needed.

“Wha…” Misa seemed stumped, looking back towards Light to try and get an answer out of him but alas, he had nothing. He wasn’t even thinking about her at the moment, L could tell.

“Ah, what am I doing? Please forgive me, I shouldn’t have questioned your devotion towards your own boyfriend, Misa. Of course you love him very much. I’m also sorry for making Light drag you out into this horrible weather. In fact, let’s go inside now,” L rushed out, moving towards the roof door, which jolted Light straight out of his frozen state. His knowing eyes never left the older as he began to follow after him with Misa latching onto his arm so he could drag her along, her touch burning through his clothing, through his very skin, even.

As the three friends made it inside, L greeted the couple again, this time with towels to dry themselves off. While Misa was busy trying to fix her makeup stained face, Light sat on the last step, a towel wrapped around his shoulders. L watched him at a distance while he dried his hair and could almost physically see the battle he was having with himself inside his head.

The bells had long since mellowed out to a tiny little dong in the back of his mind, and he knew that he _really_ didn't have much time left then.

“Misa,” he cleared his throat, and she turned herself towards him, away from her compact mirror. The eyeliner was cleaned up for the most part, and all he could see was the remaining smoke of what used to be something fierce behind those piercing eyes of hers.

“Thank you for answering my questions, and thank you for being my second friend.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Light’s head shoot up from where he was staring daggers into the floor.

“You’re welcome, Ryuzaki.” she said with a calmness he had never experienced before. She didn’t sass him, she didn’t make a joke, she didn’t do _any_ of that. For a split second, he thought that maybe that last line he had said finally got through to her and she had finally figured out what was happening.

Just as he had switched his gaze over to the young god himself, the shrill sound of his cell phone rang out into the fire escape stairwell, startling each of them a good amount. He felt his heart begin to pound in his chest as he dug it out from his pocket and held it up to his ear with his thumb and pointer finger.

“Yes?” he answered it as calmly as he would any other time, but his hand was starting to shake. It was sinking in. _He didn’t have any time left at all._

“Ah, I see. We’ll be there as soon as we can.” He hung up the phone, shoved it back into his pocket, and ran the towel through his hair one last time.

“Light?” he said finally, and he already felt like his breath had been stolen from him.

The younger man was already looking at him and nodding, and L couldn’t help but hate the fact that they understood each other so well this whole time. He didn’t even have to tell him where they were needed, or what was about to happen in that very room.

Light stood, leaving his towel on the steps behind him and started towards the main investigation room located on one of the lower levels. L dropped his towel where Light had left his and turned to follow him, his thumb finding its way back to his mouth in no time. He spared one last glance at Misa, taking note of the affect standing over that dull, gray world must’ve had on her, the affect that pure _realization_ must’ve had on her. The eyeliner was completely wiped off now and yet she continued to wipe at her face with her towel until it was beat red from irritation. _Maybe if she kept going with it,_ L thought, _she could erase herself completely from this timeline… If only it was that easy._

Maybe it _was_ that easy, though. Because when L watched Watari crumble to pieces right before his eyes, his entire childhood, adolescence, and adulthood gone in an instant, he could finally believe that death wasn’t that difficult of a wish to grant after all. It was as easy as signing your name on the dotted line, and voila, you've earned yourself a place in the afterlife. And when his heart constricted in his chest for the last time, and he fell right into Light’s waiting arms, he thought that maybe in the afterlife, they could live and love just as long as the very gods who doomed them from the start. Justice wouldn’t matter then, and he would be counting every aching moment until those knowing eyes came back around and figured him out all over again.

**Author's Note:**

> AHHHH my first lawlight fic is finally published! i'm an L kinnie and i just LOVE pain cant you tell :))))) ANYWAYS! thank you for reading if you've made it to the end, comments and kudos are always appreciated! follow me on insta or twitter @ zombiecb97 so all of us death note fans who are late to the party can scream about lawlight togther :')


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